Abandonment: The Wound That Shapes Us

But Doesn’t Define Us

You Were Not Wrong for Wanting Love

You were not too much.
You were not too needy.
You were not wrong to ask:

Where did they go?

This is not a story about blame.
This is a guide for those who waited at the window, who hoped they’d turn around.
Who learned too early how to make themselves small just to stay loved.

If You’ve Been Abandoned

Please hear this:

  • Their leaving was not your fault.

  • Their silence is not a mirror of your worth.

  • You were not hard to love.

  • You were simply asking for presence they could not give.

You don’t need closure from them.
You don’t need their apology.
You don’t need them to come back changed.

You needed love.
You needed safety.
You can give that to the child in you now.

Why Would a Soul Choose Abandonment?

The soul does not choose pain to suffer.
The soul chooses capacity.
To expand.
To master compassion.
To walk with others through darkness because it knows the way out.

The Gifts Hidden in Abandonment:

RADICAL SELF-REMEMBERING

When no one reflects your worth — you must become the mirror.
Not perform it. Remember it.
This is the PhD of identity. You become self-sourced.

COMPASSION AS A LIFEPATH

You notice what others miss.
You don’t look away from people’s pain.
Your love becomes medicine.

DETACHMENT FROM ILLUSION

When you lose what you thought you couldn’t live without,
you discover: you are still here.
Whole. Clear. Free.

INITIATION INTO INNER TRUST

They broke your trust.
But your soul begins to say:

“I trust myself now.”

Your compass sharpens.
You stop chasing.

THE GIFT OF CHOSEN FAMILY

Souls who carry this wound often rewrite lineage.
They build homes out of truth.
They become the ones they never had.

Field Healing: The Abandonment Wound

STEP 1: Acknowledge the Event

Say what happened. Out loud. Whisper if needed.

“They left.”
“They didn’t come back.”
“I waited. They didn’t show up.”

Let your field register:
It happened. And I survived.

STEP 2: Let the Feelings Out

Under the wound is:

  • Grief (I needed you)

  • Rage (Why didn’t you choose me?)

  • Shame (Was I not enough?)

  • Hope (Maybe they’ll come back…)

You are not “too emotional.”
You are clearing residue.

Feel it to completion. Cry. Scream. Shake.
Your nervous system deserves release.

STEP 3: Reparent the Inner Child

Close your eyes. See them — the version of you who was left behind.

Say:

“I see you.”
“You didn’t deserve that.”
“You are loved. You are safe. I’ve got you now.”

Let your adult self become what they needed.

STEP 4: Detach the False Beliefs

Say this out loud:

“This belief came from pain. I no longer carry it.”
“It’s safe to love now. I am safe to be loved.”

Then write down the new truth.
Let your body hear it, too.

STEP 5: Reprogram the Field

Repeat daily (touch your heart or belly):

  • I am lovable.

  • I am safe in relationships.

  • I no longer chase what left me.

  • I am home — in me.

Let repetition heal the frequency.

STEP 6: Reclaim Your Voice

Abandonment silences. Let yours return.

  • Write the unsent letter.

  • Ask for what you need.

  • Sing. Dance. Speak.

  • Say: “I matter.”

STEP 7: Close the Loop

You do not need them to come back.
You do not need revenge.
You need to remember:

“I am no longer defined by absence.
I am no longer waiting.
I am the one who came back for me.”

To the Child Who Was Just Left

You were never forgotten.
Even if they never said goodbye.
Even if they stopped calling.
Even if it’s been a lifetime.

It was not about you.
It was their distortion, their wound, their fear.

You were still the light.
You are the light.

And now — you’re no longer waiting at the door.
You’re walking through it.

You Are the One

The one your lineage has been waiting for.
The one who says:

“It ends with me.”
“It begins with me.”

And that day you chose yourself?
That was the moment the healing started.

Keep going.
The field remembers you.
And the love you never got?

You are becoming it.